HeArTfElT wOrDs......................

My Dearest Wife,

Segments of life do revolutionize and it alters out of the blue. The stuffs you do set to go with, by and large does not materialize. For a variation, for an enhanced prospective it formulates you to step into a pristine way. My way of life, and intend was based on an exclusive thing. The foremost tenet and fuel to my subsistence was analogous from 2004 to 2011. But there some far-reaching things transpired which just wobbled me and rendered me petrified to tackle the most loathsome episode of my life. 

When actuality hit me stiffly and I could not move an inch and utter a single thing then at that time I did feel that dream is just an asshole thing.  The break up or whatever people may call it had made me somehow different. I got addicted to such things which say using of it injurious to health. But at that time that was the only best option for me.

  I was distracted, unmoved and boring. And that did affect my personal, professional life deeply.  There were not any positive things in my life at that time.  Still I was living because the opposite of it was too far away from me. And I did not have any wish to go for it as I do believe the thing let it be. And that was the second best thing with me in addition to the motivation of my parents and few well-wishers. 

But like anyone faced with tragedy or some emotional shake-up I too was feeling confused and somehow lost among the complexities of my life. I was searching the ability to recover and to move on. But I could not, because I was remained a guy very much out of focus, adrift, with no clear destination. I had become familiar to the parking lot, walking on the sand, smoke and all.

I was seemingly lost within my own personal concerns.  With a thought for solitude in mind I climbed among the dunes, easily reaching the top of a small one, my thoughts still very much in turmoil. The weight of my own   was bearing heavily upon me. There was a void inside of me. This type of mentality continued for a long, it for around 4 long years. The same things were with me. There were bunch of advices, suggestions throwing on me. But truly I was avoiding those, because till that time I could not surrender myself to those things and could not make my mind to act as per the demand. 

For some people I was mad, I was coward to face the situation. For some I was ruining myself without thinking about anybody else and without giving values to my elders. But if loving her was the so called madness then yes I was mad. It was unable for me to face the sunlight, it was unable for me to forget her, and so if it was the synonym of cowardliness then I do accept I was a coward. In between these things there came some responsibilities, some demands and some true feelings. 

I came across the emotions of some personalities around me. I did try to think life in a different way. However long the scary night is but it has an end, it has the dawn. The dawn of my uncompleted, unauthorized love had come till that time. I had to start a new life; I had to face the fragile morning lights, by forgetting the past. With the passing of days I got acquainted with the new things. I was quite good as at that time. I had the support of all, because I was doing everything as per their expectation. 

And there came the most terrific things in front of me. Baba and Mamma did want me to get married. And that is the thing I had not expected at that time.  I tried to avoid that for some days and that turned into a year. Still they did approve my decision, as they had also known that I need some time for all that things. And then I went to see you as per their desire because at that time I had not the so called curiosity for that. But when I caught a glimpse of you, it was really a poles apart thing. 

I did spot you enchanting and dazzling. The way you had putted yourself was just phenomenal. You were so effortless but pretty in your way. Then the initiation of getting closer took place. We started spending time with some childish and customary talks. But till that time the word Love had not punched me in any manner. I had not any sensation for you at that time. But I had warmth, caring, concern and had a high regard for you. In this approach days went on and our Engagement date got fixed. And there I got a chance to witness you closely for the second time. 

Till that time I had nothing in my heart. Sorry if it will hurt and disappoint you but it’s true. The time came and we exchanged our rings. And after that we got some time to spend with each other. There I caught a sight of you the closest. And there you just enraptured me. I did found you sweeter and I can say the sweetest. Then when I was leaving the place as I had to, out of the blue I did intuit a void as if I am going to lose something. I was feeling like my heart playing hide and seek. As inside there I was feeling like it is pumping for few seconds and then stop doing that. I could not get the state of affairs. 

 There was totally blank. I was feeling like craving for something or may be for someone. Then I moved toward to my room with so many conflicts inside me. But I could not let my eyes to put up the shutters normally, could not give my heart to act on the whole. The exquisite picture of you started playing in front of me everything become lively dynamic, and sweetie, I fell for you. Literally I was in love with you. I just felt like my entire world flip.  Later on I confessed my feelings to you. And the rest of the things is treasured and a delightful past at this instant.

My angel, we have been together since last one year. And we have passed that marvelously with some pleasing moments. Here I would like to verbalize you that you have turned out to be the reason of my existence, my habit and my everything. They way you feel about me, the way you love me and be bothered about me is just marvelous. You have become my addiction, and I am just passionate about you.  You know I am totally careless, totally mad but sweet heart I love you the most. I want to be getting crazy for you forever. I want to love you like this ever. I want to adore you, make you delight with all that I have with me, and in return I do wish you to be with me in every condition. 

We both know each day will not go with effortlessly. Many gloomy things, strife, annoyance, fall out over something will happen. But if we can identify the cause of it and try to learn how to deal with and fine-tuning then we can formulate our life beautiful. And you know those shady things can amplify our love much solid. I am aware sweetheart you are little bit short tempered,  gnashing your teeth soon, but the mainstay of you is much fragile than all that. You are temperate when it comes to your heart. So I will take care of all that. I just need you to be there next to me every time.

Baby…. I have told you some thick-skinned words; have got outraged on you quite a few times, made you shed tears because of my dim-witted doings and futile talks. But it’s a word of honor sweetheart; I will make an effort not to do all that. I will be there with you in your every single state of affairs to tackle that together. I can’t  promise to resolve all your dilemmas but I can pledge that I will never let you face that alone. I will love you ever like I do now.  And I wish you to be the strength of mine in all circumstances and my weakness while loving you so that I can love you more and more. You are not my dream which came true but you are the one with whom I want to see all the sweet dreams every night. 

I love you my CuTiEe

I love because you have a nurturing nature and you take care of me,

You made me smile when I almost forgotten how to,

You have an honest heart,

I do love every little about you,

I love you because you are simply you......

Yours

Shona..........................